UNFORGIVENESS DEFINED

Without recourse to an overt intellectual and pedantic approach to this issue, we shall work towards giving adequate meaning to this sensitive subject – unforgiveness.

It is my candid opinion in this pursuit that a reversal approach will do our understanding a world of good. In other words, let us spell out what forgiveness means; and, then, we can deduce what its direct opposite, unforgiveness, is.

FORGIVENESS

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace (Ephesians 1:7).

In this verse, we see that forgiveness renders explanation for redemption. That is to say that forgiveness and redemption are functionally and practically the same.

A forgiven individual is a redeemed person. No charges hang upon him anymore. His errors are taken away. He has a clean slate as though he has never done any wrong.

Therefore, forgiveness is the total removal or taking away of someone’s errors or wrongdoings which, indeed, he is guilty of. Thereafter, such a person stands free without any charge.

It is the cancellation of the debt of the debtor by the creditor, so that the debtor is in no danger of the bondage or punishment of the erstwhile debt. He owes no more in the books of the creditor. He can no longer receive any punishment for debt.

This is why our scripture verse links forgiveness with the riches of God’s grace.

In our faith, where forgiveness is exercised, the one to whom it’s shown is actually in the wrong; he does not merit it. But grace, a type of mercy, produces an item of its riches to pardon the offender. That item of riches is called forgiveness.

We can conclude, therefore, that anyone who forgives his offender is actually rich, very rich in grace.

This is the wonder of Jesus to mankind while they brutally hung him on the cross.

Then said Jesus said, “Father, forgive them for they do not know what they do …” (Luke 23:34).

Immediately corroborating the meaning of forgiveness as given above is the account in Matthew 18: 21-27.

Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, and released him, and forgave him the debt (v. 27).

Forgiveness is the product of compassion that makes you to set free anyone who has wronged you. In this passage, we see the indebted servant asking for more time to clear his liability. The master, however, chose to set him free. Forgiveness is a spiritual wealth that makes you to let go of whosoever might have wronged you, both in your mind, and in practical terms.

At the end of every seven years you shall grant a release of debts. And this is form of the release: Every creditor who has lent any thing to his neighbour shall release it; he shall not require it of his neighbour or his brother, because it is called the LORD’s release. Of a foreigner you may require it; but your hand shall release what is owed by your brother (Deuteronomy 15:1-3).

Forgiveness, we see again, is the LORD’s release.

It is to write off, courtesy of your largesse of mercy, whatever debt or offence that may have been done against you. When you write off, you do not exact again. Meaning that you do not think of, neither treat, the forgiven as indebted to you, or offensive to you on that account any further. You release!

The Biblical prodigal son was forgiven unquestionably by his father, though he had already given up on the possibility of still maintaining his sonship status on returning (Luke 15). But the father pardoned his foolishness and, also, restored him to his original status as son.

Forgiveness, in truth, can only be achieved by divine power and His grace, especially where the offence is terrible or great. Nonetheless, if we must be like our Father, we must receive divine help to do it.

For the prodigal son, we see forgiveness as a virtue that enabled the father to let go on the waste that the son had made of his wealth, pardon his riotous living, welcome and restore him to the old dignity.

Note, however, that forgiveness having been granted, the father had no room for the errors that lured the son away from his domain. Forgiveness did not offer the restored son the liberty to duplicate the wastefulness and riotous lifestyle in the father’s domain.

Given this background on what forgiveness means, we can thus throw light on unforgiveness.

UNFORGIVENESS

This is the direct opposite of all we have highlighted thus far. Therefore, unforgiveness can be defined thus:

  • Refusal to cancel the debt owed you, especially over a long             time, by whoever, with the attitude to punish the debtor in the face of his inability and plea.
  • Unwillingness to release whoever has wronged you, in your mind and action.

In this situation, you will find out that any time such a person’s thought runs through your mind, you would rather wish him evil. Better still, you may not even wish him evil, but you don’t mind if evil befalls him. In that situation of mind, if you were in a position to help him out of any trouble, you would deny him the help.

That is why unforgiveness is described as charismatic witchcraft.

Unforgiveness is:

  • descriptive of uncircumcision of the heart.
  • an exhibition of demeaning spiritual ignorance.
  • a show of lack of understanding of how the human body works and thrives.

It is akin to uncircumcision of the heart (spirit) because a man cannot claim to be born again and not forgive even when the offender apologizes.

Where there is no apology, due to distance or any other excuse, it behoves the one hurt to forgive, to write off (on account of the grace of the Lord, to be able to obey the Lord) the offence of the offender. After all, who is more important to you – your Lord, or your offender?

If care is not taken, unforgiveness could make you a spiritual slave to your offender.

In this manner, therefore, pray:

Our Father in  heaven,

Hallowed be Your name…

And forgive us our debts,

As we forgive our debtors (Matthew 6:9, 12).

Furthermore, unforgiveness could mean the following:

  • To hold somebody captive in your mind for wrongdoing.

It is forgetting how one was declared saved in the first place (Ephesians 2:8-10).

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace (Ephesians 1:7).

If God, through Jesus, were unforgiving, we would all be doomed.

  • It is also a display of spiritual ignorance to dwell in unforgiveness. Just as it is with an uncircumcised heart, I speak here of the lack of the knowledge of God, or the blatant lack of the love of God in the one who refuses to forgive.

It is actually unwise to dwell in unforgiveness.

  • Unforgiveness is also a rampaging internalized bug, a spiritual hold in the body it resides. The effect is dysfunctional adrenalin gland following its accumulated effect.

Stress is induced in your body system, your toxin level rises as a result, and over time resentment to the debtor or offender brews diseases in your body system. Seek God sufficiently to help you delete unforgiveness from the file of your life.

Forgiveness may seem painful at the outset, but unforgiveness is more costly, now and in eternity. Forgiveness is actually a mark of circumcision of the heart; it is God-likeness. Unforgiveness is damaging self-justification, based on rationalizations, which ensnare its victim in a life pattern of resentment, fear and eternal damnation.

To forgive, though difficult for mortal men, it is possible for you. You are a believer, and live by grace of the power of the life of God. When you forgive, then God can take up your case as the right Judge.

In unforgiveness, you play the judge; and God, the true Judge, is hindered.

Do away with unforgiveness. That way, God stands for you.

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MANIFESTATIONS OF UNFORGIVENESS

It is possible to rationalize that we have no hurt against anyone sometimes, especially if we have not suffered sore abuse in life. Whether grievous or not, unforgiveness arising from offences can settle passively in one’s subconscious, especially when it has been within us over a long period of time.

Are you aware that some folks perpetuate unforgiveness in their lineage by passing the records of the wrongs of their offenders to their children so that the venom of hate is kept alive?

We would want to cite some instances of unforgiveness in this chapter. They are the manifestations of unforgiveness.

INSTANCES

1.         Keeping a letter of offence

Somebody sinned against you in 1948, and, here you are in 2007, you have it in your file cabinet. You even have the intention to pass the document to your children so that they can keep up the fight after you are gone. It is a document of malice, throw it away!

2.         Keeping reminders of a fight

Years back, you fought with a neighbour. She tore your valuable dress; and you still keep the dress to provoke your hatred. Unforgiveness. If you continue like this, a demon of offence will always pull out the record of the torn dress to hinder your miracle. Destroy reminders of hurts.

3.         Stored text messages of hurts.

Somebody still keeps a text message of abuse (or a number of them), and sundry telephony hurts.

You say it is an evidence to disgrace, condemn and humiliate the offender when you meet in the family house, or some other rendezvous.

Child of God, delete the rubbish. You are greater than any message of insult. When the Lord shall turn your captivity, when God shall rise upon you for glory, all of them will eat their words of scorn (Psalm 126:1-3; Isaiah 60:1-2).

If you don’t, your prayer of ‘die by fire’ will be a waste.

4.         Formation of factions in the local assembly in the name of fighting for God

I am for Paul, not for Apollos, and vice-versa, is an off-shoot of hurts. There would have been no camps in places of worship if offences had not crept in.

Armed with Scripture, a lot of us would prove why they loathe another servant or child of God. In their bid to help God and His institution, we unwittingly go carnal. Factions break out. This must stop. Let us repent.

Agreed, we must maintain the standard of God for us, but let us do so in love, being mindful of the fact that we are all one body, the Body of Christ.

There is one body, and one Spirit, just as you were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all (Ephesians 4:4-6).

5.         Founding a church assembly on strife

Any such church has already failed. The foundation is wrong and stormy.

May be your Senior Pastor rebuked you, or you picked a sincere defect in him, which precipitated some misunderstanding. As a result, you decided to leave to found yours; after all, you have the anointing. This is a ticket to working in the absence of love. There is no future for such work in the scheme of God.

Assistant Pastors who have done this must go and settle with their masters. Otherwise, the wind, when it blows, will cause its eventual collapse. Great will be such a fall.

Please, settle. Life is run on principles. God will forgive.

6.         Malice

Where malice, ill-will or resentment is, unforgiveness is the bedrock. To bear ill-will is to have some unkind feeling towards a subject or person. This normally occurs if you are offended by the person, especially when you would not release him or her.

So, every time he comes across, you hiss, inwardly or outwardly. You would rather you didn’t see him or her. His or her presence infuriates you.

Watch it! You may end up bitter towards the person, and hatred (a euphemism for murder) may creep in. You thus become liable to the danger of hell fire!

Your glorying is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump? Therefore purge out the old leaven, that you may be a new lump, since you truly are unleavened. For indeed Christ, our Passover, was sacrificed for us. Therefore let us keep the feast, not with old leaven, nor with the leaven of malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth (1Corinthians 5:6-8).

7.         Ego and pride

Some people take undue advantage of whoever is perceived to have wronged them. They treat their offenders as enemies. That is pride. You proudly or arrogantly deny the offender his due or right, just because sometime in the past he has sinned against you.

This tendency is tantamount to an abuse, an ego problem.

8.         Broken homes

Just because a spouse is wronged, he or she takes it as too grievous. He or she says that it only in heaven that the matter will be settled. There is no guarantee that such a fellow will make heaven.

Another says, ‘Over my dead body’. The result is that the relationship cracks, fragments, and, if care is not exercised, it collapses irretrievably. The union or the marriage ceases to work.

Just a little forgiveness, and the centre would still have held. Unforgiveness, however, has made things to fall apart. The falcon can no longer hear the falconer.

Many are the manifestations or instances of unforgiveness. But suffice it to wrap up this chapter by recounting two incidents of unforgiveness. They were so sore that, were it not for God, the culprits would have lived in vain.

INCIDENT NUMBER ONE

            Snatched Fiancé

Two sisters existed or lived. The older had a fiancé whom the younger had a terrible crush for. But not knowing this, the older would often send the younger to her man. Sooner rather than later, the younger had baited the man, whereupon she and her sister’s fiancé began to date. Before you could say Jack, they were married.

The older sister got terribly bitter as a result. Her nervous system broke down; she became paralyzed. Meanwhile, the marriage continued.

The paralyzed sister began to move from one church to another in search of divine cure – on a wheel chair.

Fortunately, she met a prophet who never knew her from Adam. The prophet told her that her paralysis was the result of unforgiveness. He further told her that she would only be healed of her paralysis the day she forgave. In which case, she would have to forgive her younger sister who had snatched her husband-who-would-have-been.

But the paralyzed sister said, ‘No, never!’ She said that she would fight her sister right into heaven. The prophet replied her frankly: ‘Okay, keep staying on your wheel chair; but, if you forgive, you will get out of that chair.’ She would have none of it. But after much internal struggle, the power of God fell on her. She started to sob, and cried: ‘I forgive, I forgive my sister’ (She mentioned the name of the sister and the man.) And she rose up from the wheel chair.

This is a story of the miracle of forgiveness in the face of unforgiveness.

INCIDENT NUMBER TWO

            Turned back at Heaven’s gate

A woman, generous in the church, an office holder, died. She was given a unique burial with cemetery allotment in the church premises. She got to the port of entry into heaven, and was turned back by an angel.

Reason: While she lived, she had held somebody (maliciously) up in her mind. Fortunately, she was sent back to the earth to repent. And she woke up.

The question is: How about many others with uncircumcised minds who have died without such an opportunity for repentance? What would be their fate?

Please, throw unforgiveness away!

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IMPLICATIONS OF UNFORGIVENESS

By now some implications of unforgiveness would have dawned on us. But let us do a wider exposition here. Implications refer to results. When you thrive on unforgiveness, holding offenders bound in your mind, looking forward to punishing them, the following results become inevitable.

Let us segment them into two:

  • Results defining your person
  • Results in relation to your works

UNFORGIVENESS IN RELATION TO YOUR PERSON

When you harbour unforgiveness, it defines your person in the following manner:

1.      You are not genuinely born again. That is, your circumcision of heart is in doubt (Romans 2:29).

2.      If truly born again, you are disobedient to God (Matthew 6:12).

3.      You are not in the good books of God (Matthew 6:14-15).

4.      You are a charismatic witch in effect. This is because unforgiveness in you will provoke bitterness and resentment towards the one who offended you after a while. The tendency is that, whenever and wherever possible, you block his chances and, unwittingly, manipulate circumstances against him, within your circle of influence.

5.      You are a little corruption in the system of God, the little leaven that leavens the lump. You become a channel for the spirit of pride.

6.      You are also a barbarian pray-er unless you forgive (Psalm 66:18); a babbler of some sort, irrespective of your collar.

7.      You are unlike God in your unforgiveness. How would it sound to you to be called an ‘ungodly born again Christian?’ It sounds   like an unmixable combination. But that’s who you really are spiritually: you are torn apart within, a split mind. The danger is that if you dwell too long on it, you would think it is normal.

The one who does not forgive has little or no love in him. That’s why he or she is unlike God: for God is love.

UNFORGIVENESS IN RELATION TO YOUR CONCERNS

Unforgiveness hinders the word of your prayers from being performed (Psalm 66:18). Realise, please, that prayer-making is work (Acts 12:5; Luke 18:1).

Unforgiveness results in the following:

  • Broken homes, and shredded families.
  • Opens the door to demonic attacks and operations.
  • Hindrance to the flow of the power of God in one’s life.
  • Shuts out revelations, the mind of God, from one.
  • Kills spiritually.
  • Robs of eternity; and sends to hell fire.
  • Initiates spiritual cancer.
  • Wastes one’s labour on earth.
  • Elongates and expands problems with attendant division and strife.

Further to the above, unforgiveness will:

  • Delay the manifestation of your miracle and expectations.
  • Stagnate and ground your advancement in life.
  • Hold back heaven from releasing benefits.
  • Provoke sickness in the body.
  • Cause the loss of spiritual gifts.
  • Make your prayer and giving to be in vain.

Moses, the man of God, was tested in the field of provocations with the danger of unforgiveness trailing him.

They angered Him also at the waters of strife, so that it went ill with Moses on account of them; because they rebelled against His Spirit, so that he spoke rashly with his lips (Psalm 106: 32-33).

Moses, the meekest man in the world in his day, was sore provoked by the people of Israel en route to the Promised Land. As long as he took it in and would not empty the provocation by adequate forgiveness, the following happened:

1.   Moses took ill.

2.   Moses spoke unadvisedly; he spoke contrary to the will of God.

Indeed, Moses’ reaction to these agent provocateurs resulted in an unceremonious end to his ministry, whereupon he could not enter the Promised Land.

This snippet about Moses is a hot signal to the leaders in ministry. Some of you may have made some dangerous pronunciations with the conditional article ‘if’ out of followership’s provocation and abuse of relational privileges. Please, cancel such ill-advised and untoward declarations today. And it shall not be ill with you in Jesus name.

For the sakes of your followers and yourself, leaders, please, when you are provoked, handle the situation with gracious pardon. You can even work out an exit, so that you do not speak contrary to the will of God.

By so doing, you will not experience any unsavoury fallout of ill-advised utterance.

LEADERSHIP AND UNFORGIVENESS

In any place, organisation or nation, the leader is the lid. To a large extent, he determines the operating atmosphere, content of activities and, even, the attitude of the followership. That is why an articulate leader would always produce his likeness, and a foul-tempered head his duplicates also.

Where leadership is venomous with unforgiveness abounding in mind and utterances, great danger looms for the followership, and for the leader himself in return.

This tendency was a stigma in the ministry of the big prophet Elisha. Elisha knew how to follow (Elijah), but he chose not to build up, or cultivate, followership. The result was that he had no successor.

Here are two instances regarding the unforgiving attitude of Elisha and its effects.

1.   Elisha and the Mocking Kids (2 Kings 2:23-25)

Forty-two children, in their foolishness, mocked Elisha, the prophet of God, under his unusual anointing. Elisha had it within himself to forgive or to punish them. He chose not to forgive them. His unforgiveness resulted in the destruction of those destinies.

Unforgiveness will precipitate destruction.

2.   Elisha and Gehazi (2 Kings 5:20-27)

Gehazi, obviously, was covetous. But, his master, Elisha, had the rod and staff to put him right. Elisha had the choice to forgive him, or not to; he had the superintendent oversight to determine his measure of punishment, to scold or not to. Again, Elisha was too quick to slam an extreme penalty upon Gehazi and his generation, a generation that did not sin.

Elisha’s unforgiving trait deadened his bowels of mercy, and he used his anointing destructively. This teaches us that unforgiveness is a sign of lack of mercy.

In the interaction of Elisha with Gehazi in this episode, we see the evil of unforgiveness as below:

  • Unforgiveness in Elisha destroyed the destiny of Gehazi and his generation.
  • Unforgiveness in Elisha destroyed the possibility of the continuity of the ministry of Elisha. When he made a leper of Gehazi, he banished him, his possible successor, to permanent obscurity.
  • Unforgiveness in Elisha resulted in the abuse of his God-given power or anointing.

We thus conclude that concerning the lives of leaders, the implications of unforgiveness are grave. They include the following:

1.   Abuse of position, authority and resources.

2.   Short-circuiting and truncating of ministries. The leader dies with the investment of God, and we have a ministerial failure.

3.   Destruction of precious destinies.

RECAP

We need to secure God’s forgiveness when we sin; and He forgives readily. In the same way, we need to know and practise self-forgiveness and inter-personal forgiveness.

Self-forgiveness is when you pardon your own personal errors and put them behind you. You stop brooding over them, so that you can move on in life. If you don’t, you would be grounded.

Interpersonal forgiveness is to pardon and put behind you the wrongs of the other person, and for another person to let go of your wrongs.

Let us, in closing, cite a case of self-unforgiveness.

SELF-UNFORGIVENESS

An apostle of Jesus had done a terrible thing – betrayal of his Lord. This betrayal led to the crucifixion of his Lord. We are talking about Judas Iscariot (Matthew 27:3-50).

He was not the only one who had betrayed Jesus: Peter and many others had. Many abandoned Jesus (John 6:66), and Peter blatantly denied him three times (Luke 22:57-61).

But unlike Peter, whose repentance was complete, Judas only regretted. He sought no forgiveness from God, and neither forgave himself. The result was that he committed suicide by hanging.

Suicide is self-murder, a grievous sin which leads straight to hell fire.

What implications does Judas’ self-unforgiveness relay?

1.   Unforgiveness towards oneself totally blinds one’s reasoning                                   faculty.

2.   Unforgiveness toward oneself, in its extremity, leads to suicide.

3.   Unforgiveness toward oneself ultimately leads to hell fire.

4.   Self unforgiveness ends one’s ministry. Judas’ place was later to be filled by another by ballot (Acts 1:15-26).

Brethren, a word is enough for the wise: shun unforgiveness. It is not worth dying for. Receive grace to forgive, in the name of Jesus. Peace.

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SOLUTIONS OF UNFORGIVENESS

But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing will be there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy, and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace (James 3:14-18).

Unforgiveness is obviously a negative and debilitating spiritual influence that has not a single true benefit. It is actually cancerous and there should be no allowance for it in the bossom of the wise. Come to think of it, I mean you are sure to pick an offence if somebody walked up to you, and said that you are very foolish. But here we are talking about wisdom for the wise in a world of darkness.

The unforgiving retains unsavoury memory that precipitates anger, that unleashes internal heat, burning the person inside, discomfiting his externality. But, practically, that is the identity of the unforgiving: he sins against God, and against his own body.

You actually cannot be truly your right self in the atmosphere of unforgiveness.

Unforgiveness causes pain, stress, and discomfort of spirit, soul and body.

Through the stress it unleashes, your toxicity increases, resulting in defective body organs, arthritis, high blood pressure, and, practically throwing up in some cases. Definitely, unforgiveness is a disease.

Taking it further, politicking in the church, is a result of unforgiveness. You colour your so-called mandate from God with partiality and hypocrisy because you loathe a certain tribe or race which, according to your parents, or some history, did your own tribe or race certain wrong. On that basis, you discriminate covertly; you distance the ‘guilty’ tribe or race from your list of assignees.

You harbour this pathological unforgiveness. You are afraid lest the brethren from the geographical zone of your perceived historical hurt betray or repeat the past evil -though both of you are now in the Lord. That is why there is phenomenal Ichabod in the pulpit and in the pew today. The glory of the Lord departs from where unforgiveness thrives

Do we not have all around us churches, organisations, etc., where only a particular tribe predominates? An Igbo pastor is patronized by Igbos only; a Yoruba pastor’s assembly is full of his tribal people. Why? God is the Father of us all; so why the tribal loading? It could be an extrapolation of unforgiveness.

We must invite the Holy Spirit with all sincerity to help sanitize, fumigate and cleanse our environment and people of this gangrene of unforgiveness. Otherwise, we would only work, walk and live in vain. We must tell ourselves the truth always, but in love. We must repent and forsake the demon of unforgiveness – pronto!

We can only sow righteousness where there is peace. Peace, on the other hand, can only thrive where unforgiveness has been eliminated. That is why we are addressing the issue of its solution in this chapter. Amen.

SOLUTION

Solution presupposes the presence of a problem. Unforgiveness is a problem, as we have seen. Solution is the way forward to remove or stop the problem. Here is the way out.

1.         Acknowledge your unforgiveness

Until a man agrees within him that he is a sinner, he cannot understand the need for repentance, or reconciliation with the only wise God.

The first step to solving any problem is to first own up to its reality in your situation. Do not be self-righteous as to deny your unforgiveness, if you notice its symptoms in your life. Its symptoms we have directly or indirectly given attention in previous chapters.

Do not be self-righteous as to deny your inadequacy of unforgiveness, if you notice its symptoms in your life. Its symptoms we have given attention in previous chapters.

When you do, you can be set free (John 8:32). Please, do not excuse or rationalize your unforgiveness. Deal with it.

2.         Understand the source of unforgiveness, and the power of forgiveness

When a problem is to be solved, a successful surgery will only occur at the root level. Otherwise, the ailment will recur.

In the same vein, we must understand that unforgiveness is a planting of Satan. And a true child of God cannot afford to be an ally of Satan. So you want to do away with his property (Matthew 3:10).

But he answered and said, “Every plant, which My heavenly Father has not planted will be uprooted” (Matthew 15:13).

More importantly, however, is that you must understand that for you to be able to walk above unforgiveness, you must receive grace. The riches of God’s grace is the source of victory over unforgiveness.

Therefore, you do not braggadociosly throw yourself around, and put a bold face, that you can consistently operate above unforgiveness at all times by your capacity as a mortal. God exercises forgiveness, out of His bowels of compassion, mercy and grace.

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace (Ephesians 1:7).

When you understand this, you can reach out for grace to lift you above unforgiveness.

3.         Make God’s pleasure your priority

The only way of the Christian life is to do all things as unto the Lord. Otherwise, there is always an excuse not to.

And whatsoever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not to men (Colossians 3:23).

Unless you see God in all your undertakings, you won’t go far. Even in the issue of forgiveness, if you do not focus on pleasing God, the gravity of the offence in your perception may incapacitate you.

You are forgiving your offender not primarily because of him or her, but because God commands it. You want to basically be at peace with God.

And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses (Matthew 6:12, 14-15).

If God holds your sins against you, who will help you? Satan’s foot soldiers can thus set in, and do further damage.

And above all else, the reason we are alive is to please God. To be unforgiving is to live in contradiction to God’s pleasure.

You are worthy, O Lord,

To receive glory and honour and power;

For You created all things,

And by Your will they exist and were created (Revelation 4:11).

Unforgiveness is antithetic to the pleasure of God. Unforgiveness is, therefore, opposed to true and godly faith. Forgiveness, however, is faith in action (Hebrews 11:6). When you forgive, God takes over the battle.

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace (Ephesians 1:7).

Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. “Therefore if your enemy hungers, feed him; if he thirsts, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good (Romans 12:17-21).

4.         Understand that forgiveness is deliverance from evil work

Understanding brings establishment, so you need it concerning unforgiveness (Proverbs 24:3b).

Understanding flows from knowledge; it is a product of knowledge. The righteous is only free through knowledge that is understood (Romans 10:17).

But through knowledge the righteous will be delivered (Proverbs 11:9b).

Understanding unforgiveness, as revealed in Matthew 6:15, will give you the following insights:

  • Unforgiveness makes God, your Father, to label you as a rebel (Luke 6:46).
  • Unforgiveness makes God to restrict you.
  • Unforgiveness works against you; just what your enemy desires.

You become the loser that your enemy wants; and, indirectly, you are subjected to his will and wish. You don’t want to be your enemy’s underdog, do you?

That is why, following understanding, you throw the garbage of unforgiveness overboard in your life. Amen.

5.         Repentance and restitution

When you come to the knowledge of truth about a thing, a sin for example, you do not just accent to it mentally – you do something positive about it.

That positive action is called repentance. That is to say, you change your mind, and do the new decision. You change from unforgiveness to forgiveness.

Basically and before all else, however, you must begin Godward. You repent unto God, confessing the error of unforgiveness in your life and receive pardon divine.

Then you practically let go of the revenge you have been nursing to hatch against your offender. You verbally declare that you forgive the offender, even in absentia; and to his or her face, if you have the opportunity of his or her presence.

By that singular act, you are free of every spiritual hold, bondage and entanglement from that unforgiveness. You can then move forward with your life.

In some instances, however, you may have to complete your demonstration of repentance by returning whatever belongs to the offender in your possession or holding back. This is what is called restitution. This needs the mature guidance you can receive only from the Holy Spirit.

Zacchaeus, the tax collector, did this in furtherance of his repentance after he met the Lord Jesus. He said that he would return fourfold anything he had taken falsely from any man (Luke 19:1-8). Actually, Zacchaeus was an offender (v.7). He got Jesus’ forgiveness. Perhaps, the community forgave him eventually. But, he, by his restitution , had shown desire for peace.

Therefore, where necessary, complement your repentance with restitution.

6.         Rededication

This is necessary for the Christian when he feels any crack in his or her walk with God. It is a good thing to do in restoring fellowship with God, after emptying oneself of the poison of unforgiveness.

Rededication is an attempt at perfection or maturity (Mathew 5:48). God demanded it of Abram.

When Abram was ninety-nine years old, and the LORD appeared to Abram, and said to him, “I am Almighty God; walk before Me, and be blameless” (Genesis 17:1).

7.         Guidance of the Holy Spirit in the aftermath of forgiveness.

After delivering your forgiveness, you do not make yourself vulnerable all together to the circumstances that allowed the error in the first instance. When you forgive, you do not position your face again for another slap. There must be balancing.

Let the Holy Spirit lead you concerning what next to do after forgiving an offender. It may be that henceforth you allow a gap, to forestall a recurrence of abuse, for example. You must ensure balance.

You can forgive and give a token; and begin to relate to and love the person at a distance. For some, God could lead you to bring them close again, or some measured closeness, or even more than before.

You must let the Holy Spirit give you the terms of the relationship after forgiveness. For example, for anyone who may have suffered sexual abuse, and goes to forgive her abuser, she should not allow any relationship or situation that could breed such incident again, irrespective of how sorry the rapist may have professed.

We must forgive absolutely, but the Holy Spirit must guide our next action. Hallelujah!

8.         Blood of Jesus as a purge

This is a solution to be mindful of. Plead the blood of Jesus against any influence of unforgiveness in your life, and you will be delivered.

How much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered Himself without spot to God, purge your conscience from dead works to serve the living God? (Hebrews 9:14)

9.         The Word applied

It is not enough to have taken in the Word; you must to use it. It is the applied Word that works (James 1:25).

When you invoke the Word of God against the spirit of unforgiveness in your life, you will be delivered, and sanctified (Matthew 3:10; 15:13).

Application of the Word is a solution. God honours His Word wherever.

Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth (John 17:17).

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